Squeezing In Between

Okay, the previous entry was really harsh. To all those concerned, I’m not dying. Even if some people wish that I am. Hahaha! I know there are some freaking haters out there. Bug off! I sound so bitchy and mean today. I don’t know why. I was unusually silent too. No, I’m not planning to destroy or take over the world. (corny!)

Anyway, nothing bad is gonna happen to me. To those concerned, thanks for showing them. Maybe I just needed a bit of attention. My tummy’s been aching the whole day. Could it be that I’m constipated? LOL

Am not making any sense here. I’m just typing something. I guess my entries here are some kinda written out of rush. And yes, I regret typing them later. Tsk tsk. Just like what happened today. I wrote that supercontroversial entry. Then, this afternoon. I was really loathing it. I was wishing that no one would read it. It was a shame. (BAD MONIQUE!) I hope I’m not gonna write something that I will regret later on. I know I wouldn’t regret this entry. There’s nothing bad in here. I should have thought twice before writing the previous entry. It has double meanings.

Tell you the truth, I’m not having any problems at all. Maybe, I was having a teensy-weensy bit, but it’s really nothing. Maybe it was just because of the heat that I was forced to write that entry. And maybe out of frustration too. I don’t really know why. Darn! I’m so impulsive. Maeve are you hearing me? Why am I so darn impulsive?

Well, the previous entry was just a reminder. Kind of a knock-knock kind of thing. It wakes your senses. Right, girls? 1,2,3,4… How many could relate to this? Heck, even guys do. Right, 1? 2? 3? (Sorry, no names allowed! You know who you are anyway.)

Ok. Advices now.

Eri, give him the benefit of the doubt. They might really be sweet and all, but you don’t really know the real score between them. They might be just really THAT CLOSE. Ask him or even her about their real situation. Ask it in a very casual way though. I know the truth may hurt, but it’s better that you know it.

AJ, you’re so lucky that you’re a chick magnet. I know that some guys are really envious of you. LOL Iba ka eh. Lapitin ng girls. Just take care ok? Ayokong may death threat pa ulit. 😉

Raif, shocked? I just wanna tell you that if you have any problem, you could tell me that. I know that our past was really hazy and unclear. It was somewhat of an unsolved issue. Anyway, you’re still my friend.

Tropang Pauso, we have our own love lives already. I wish we could have a get-together soon. I really want to re-connect with you.

Kenneth, take care of my friend ok? Buti pa kayo, ang saya saya nyo.

Rizzie, *love of my life….* Miss you girl! (The song’s for your love.)

Chuchay, I so miss you! Anyway, let’s be strong. Don’t mind those guys who took advantage of you. They’re gonna get what they deserve.

I have a long list here. But I guess I’ll just continue this another time.

I haven’t really been a good and understanding girl for the past few days. Don’t mind the “piaw si”. I don’t even know it’s real meaning. LOL My Chinese friends don’t even know! Goodness!

I don’t really know if I’m gonna make this entry Public or Private. But I already placed advices there. 😦 So I guess this would be a public post.

Why did I even put advices there? It’s just no use I think. Those were really cliche stuff. Maybe I just want to remind these guys that it’s not the end of the world. Well, this goes out to you and me too. To all of us. This is a reminder that everything has a solution. Maybe just not now, but there would soon be a solution.

Nakakadala kayo. Pati tuloy ako parang may problema na rin. Hindi sa love life. Sa tulog. Hahaha! Ewan, kasi parang tinatakasan ko mga problems ko. Bad yon diba? Eh ano gagawin ko? I don’t really know how to speak, how to voice out my feelings. Hanggang sulat na lang siguro ako. Basta, wala akong kagalit. Kung may galit sakin, fine. Sorry. Pero I don’t mean to hurt anyone. Ewan ko ba. I feel like I’m such a bad person already. Feeling ko, ang galing-galing ko. Feeling ko, ako si Dr. Monique na kayang i-solve ang problems ng iba. Ayon, advice dito, advice doon. Well, may gumagaling naman eh. Wala pa namang lumalala. Wag naman sana. Pero bakit ganon? Ang sarili ko, di ko kayang magamot. Ironic no? I know that there’s something in my attitude that I need to change. I was constantly reminded of this. Yet, I don’t know which. Maybe I’m too frank or tactless. Maybe I’m too quiet or shallow. Maybe I’m too bossy. Maybe I’m too all-knowing. But believe me, I know that I’m not perfect. Even I have problems as well. There’s no exempting myself. One day, I would love to see myself smiling. Smiling and not hiding my tears.

Unless this sick feeling in my gut goes away, I’m still restless. It’s just that I know that something’s not right. This is not about hunger or constipation. It’s instinct.


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