*sigh*

This is the first time I’ve felt somehow… unloved.

I don’t know how to really put into words what I’m really feeling right now.

It’s been almost a month since his friend told me that HE likes me.

I don’t even want to type this entry for my friends would be reading my blog. How embarrassing…

You see, I have a crush on this guy. And HIS friend told me that HE likes me. HIS friend even talked to my mom about it. And my mom who always wanted for me to have a boyfriend, said something to HIS friend that somehow signifies that HE is open to court me. I was giddy. Ugh. Who wouldn’t? It’s like I had a long-time crush on him! (Almost a year, mind you.)

And last night, HE told me that the rumors (being those what HIS friend are telling people) weren’t true.

So this is how it feels to be heartbroken.

My mom said that time would heal my heart. I shouldn’t jump fast from one relationship to another.

I’m quite embarrassed. But I have nowhere to vent out my feelings. (Of course, that’s a lie. I have 2 private real journals kept in my room.) But the point is, I want a solicited, or even an unsolicited, opinion regarding this matter. (Ma, Aunt, and Shobe, are you reading this?)

Well, maybe this isn’t the right time for us.

Oh, and by the way, HE asked me last night if I could sing. I might be singing for our YFC Camp. πŸ™‚ Now, that’s something that makes me smile. But when I remember how cute he waved at me last Sunday, I can’t help but feel anguish.

Oh well. Is this what you call puppy love?

I can’t believe I’ve typed all that. Oh well, sometimes I do crazy things. 😦

Right now, I can’t describe what I’m feeling. I’m caught in between.

Most of my time are spent posting at Girl Talk. It’s really great to post there and give advice.

There’s a forum there where there is a support group for those women who want to have a baby. Those women have Polycystic Ovary Syndrome (PCOS) and some have hormonal imbalance contributing to the increased hardship in creating a baby.

There’s also a forum there where some women get pregnant by ‘accident’ and they want the baby aborted.

Isn’t it ironic? Why does God give babies to those who want to kill them? It’s really a pity how some girls could just abort their babies when some are trying, even spending millions, just to have one. *cries*

That’s why I encouraged them to keep their babies. Coz who knows, that THAT baby is the only one that God will give to them, right?

Anyway, sometimes, I write for Manila Collegian. I have an article pending but I still couldn’t finish it because the interview with Dr. Ramon Arcadio, the new UPM Chancellor, would take place on Thursday. I might pass the article on Friday. πŸ™‚

How’s your Halloween guys? How’s sembreak so far?

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